Here I am again, too scared to actually pick up the bottle. Why drown yourself in sorrow if you can enjoy it while being sober, right? The idea to feel absolutely numb is very attractive but what will I learn from that? It seems this is one lesson I just keep relearning though. This is a different pain to the others, I was fooled into thinking this one was going to be different. In a blur of excitement everything can change so quickly. That's the big problem with having a literal bleeding heart, you care too quick and everything is veiled with good intentions and seeing the best in people. Even when you have a peek behind the veil and see the hurt and pain of others you feel honoured by the idea that you are being trusted with what you are seeing. The deceiving part of all this is that veils aren't for covering the face permanently, so you still get to see the good intentions and the best in the person when it comes off but it gets mixed in with the hurt and pain. You focus...